It’s been a while since i posted on my blog, i kinda let it go and let life happen instead. So much has happened since my last post in 2013, i’ve gotten married, moved out of home, had 2 kids (boys) and work responsibilities increased. Research has shown that the most stressful events that affect a person most in life include moving and death of a loved one. I unfortunately experienced both of these in the space of less than 12 months. Probably the most painful thing i’ve had to go through in the 20+ odd years that i’ve been alive, is the passing on of my Father earlier this year in January. It has affected me in ways that i don’t even understand yet, but my future writings will be a journey of discovery as i walk this new path, learning to live without him.
I certainly have become more withdrawn and reflective about life, the meaning of it, and life after death. Often i catch myself looking at the meaninglessness of every trivial thing we as people say, think, do or pursue in life and wonder why i should bother trying at all since we’re all going to die someday. It’s a feeling that paralyses you, beyond lethargy, it just makes you not want to do or try anything.
Fighting this feeling and waking up each day has been a constant battle, not in the suicidal sense, but rather the sense that “why should i bother?” and “we’re doomed to death anyway regardless of efforts or merits”. Yet my responsibility to my wife, my children, my family, my community and my nation forces me to act differently, to believe in the hope of tomorrow and to inspire others to do the same. Life is worth living to the fullest, which means dying empty, having poured yourself out completely and unashamedly.
This is why i’m writing again, taking every opportunity available to pour myself out. BELIEVE. ACT. INSPIRE.